They are on numerous blogs, communities, forums, and guides. Go to a meet-up and there is bound to be somone talking about them. Switching between subgenres can be tricky because each subgenres seems to have their own different set. Rules. What you should and should not wear. How you should and should not act. Whom you should and should not associate with. And what activities you can and cannot do. While I find these lists interesting and helpful at times, there are just too many. For a fashion that has no official standardized rule book there is a sea of opinionated naysayers that will gladly tell you what is and what is not lolita.
I believe that if one is new to the fashion it is best to listen and try to follow the basic rules. But do not lose yourself trying to be what others think is the prefect lolita. Let your personality shine. You do not have to look like a walking brand store or stop having fun to be considered a good lolita. Experiment if you want to. Mix styles, be yourself, and create your own niche.
Being in the fashion for a long time has a benefit. I have seen the numerous rule lists and how-to guides. I have read the advice columns and researched the trends for my favorite subgenres. But I follow my own rules. I do not care how others think I should present myself or dress. Granted that my attitude and interests are already suited for lolita and himegyaru fashions. I am just being myself. Not letting the opinion of people I will most likely never meet effect my life.
This month I am daring you and myself to think more for ourselves. Continue to read the guides and lists but truly decide if they are any help to you. Make your own set of rules. Be your own lolita, not someone else's.
image from: myrealestateira.com